I am 3 and Mommy knows me best. Especially the rules I make her live by.
1. No sleeping for Mommy.
Whenever Mommy starts to fall asleep at any given moment, wake her up IMMEDIATELY. Shouting in her face: “No! Mommy awake!” is most effective.
2. No relaxing for Mommy.
Whenever Mommy sits down on the couch, kick her.
3. No escaping bed time with the kids for Mommy.
She must lay next to me until I am asleep. While I lay there, she must rub my back upon request.
4. No singing for Mommy.
Ever. YouTube is so much better. Scream if she tries to sing along.
5. No reading for Mommy.
I can read the book myself! The pictures are self explanatory- duh!
6. She has to be on call 24/7.
If I wake up scared in the middle of the night, she has to be the one to hold me and be next to me until I fall back asleep.
7. She can’t be a wuss.
If I fall down and scrape my knee outside, she has to be the one to carry me home. Even if she also has the pram to push, I’m not walking!
8. She has to have baby wipes everywhere we go.
Demand that she use a baby wipe. Be sure to scream if just one crumb is on your finger. The attention is so worth it.
9. She must make silly faces.
Especially when we watch the planet song on YouTube. She must make me laugh when we are together.
10. Don’t let her get a good shot!
This is the latest addition. Whenever she whips out her camera, look away, don’t stop moving, or refuse to smile. She’s got some nice pictures of me before but I won’t let it happen again!