A Diary Entry

I once had a diary that I never wrote in. I was later given another diary that I wrote stupid stuff in. I have a small collection of diaries that remain unwritten. Tonight I thought I’d write a ‘diary’ entry on my blog.

I woke up tired. And emotional. With such little sleep how can I not have a cow when the toddler starts my day off with constant whining. He started his day in time-out. When he was in a better mood we played on photo booth on the computer. A few hours later my sister came over and had Axel so that Ethan and I could go for a walk. I love our walks together. He talked to me in his animated toddler language throwing in actual words that make me feel like he’s a genius. He pointed out the flowers, the rocks, the cars, the bugs, a cat, and today he said “dirt”. I found Axel’s bootie that I lost from yesterday’s walk and tucked it in my back pocket. Today I did not limp, maybe carrying Axel in the sling is not good for my hips.

Back at home we had lunch and took naps. Considered new facebook status update: “True friends come over and take over so you can take a nap.”  My sister has always been one of my best friends.

I looked at my sister and thought back to the time before she left for America. Every Monday had been my day off work and it was our sister day. I chose a place in London to go to for the day and we would shop and hang out and eat. I chose where we went because I knew the best places to shop 🙂

Strange to think how much life changes in just a few short years. Size 8 to a size 18. Single to married. Becoming a mom of two. Conversations change from world news to family life updates. Resume content would no longer include achievements such as university degrees and travelling to a number of countries. Now it’s more like: I know by the way my toddler whines and my baby squirms when they need to poo. Or, I managed to get my toddler to eat something other than a biscuit or yogurt! Each time my sister comes over, I see this difference and hope that she still considers me to be “cool”.

After naps we watched ‘Horton Hears A Who’ for the second time today. Ethan got his chocolate milk and cuddles to help him settle from his tantrum of waking up.  Tesco delivered my groceries today. I really don’t recall ordering 4 whipping creams (I thought I ordered 2) but that’s fine. I love cream. Ethan helped unpack and brought me most of the groceries again. Such a good helper. Of course Emma helped too. I tried to not be too irritable even though I’m having pains from nursing. Must stay positive thinking and persevere.

It is now 8:30pm and I am no longer recalling the rest of my day as it’s a bit of a blur. There was dinner, a realisation that I’ve gone through 72 newborn nappies in the last 16 days, Kung Fu Panda, daddy came home and then left for the gym, Emma went home and now the house is quiet with the boys asleep and I’m writing all this on the computer, my blogged diary entry.

 When my world is still, like it is this very moment, I reflect on my goals and plans. It’s almost halfway through July already! Now I can start my new years resolutions. Checking my checklist.

1. Make 9 dresses.

2. But first I need to find the fabric.

3. Before that, I need to find “the” store that may have the fabric I have in mind.

4. With the patterns I already have, make 9 dresses. 3 different styles, 3 sizes of each.

5. Finish making the dresses by November.

6. Lose 20lbs.

7. Be happy and make my boys laugh everyday. Capture their smiles.

8. Be better at everything. A better mom. A better wife. A better cook. A better writer. A better person. A better friend.

9. Do service to others each week and to family everyday.

10. Express my love more.

My mom and I email almost everyday, and everyday she lets me know about the weather. (She knows I haven’t been able to get out much, just look out the window) Today was a nice breezy day. Perfect for sandals, jeans and a cardigan. The sun was out, clouds kept close company and I would love to go out into the evening air for another walk. But I’m tired so I will probably just have an early night.

Thanks for listening diary. x

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