He Said He Loved Me… cont’d

One afternoon we were at his house and I met his best friend. Weird guy. He was not funny, but I smiled. Finally he left, and we were alone. He said he had been looking at rings. Really? I knew he was the one! He said he had never felt a love like ours. He said he worshipped me. He said I was the kind of girl guys wrote songs about. He said to go into his bedroom. I shook my head no, and again he said he loved me. This time, I said I loved him too.

The night of his prom we met with his big group of friends at the nicest restaurant in the city. Weird guy wasn’t there. Good. While looking at the menu he whispers in my ear to order the most expensive meal. He ate two lobsters! At the Hilton, where his prom was held, the venue was extravagant and my dress flowed across the room. Later that night we kissed a lot and after he told me he loved me, I fell asleep in his arms.

Soon enough high school was a past time and summer fun was on everyone’s mind. A wedding was mine. Thank goodness I was marrying young because twenty was just old.

On a particularly hot day, I was already swimming at a public pool waiting for him to show up. He did and, to my surprise and dismay, he brought his weird friend. They were laughing a lot, but I didn’t understand their jokes.  I swam to him and wanted to put my arms around him. He smiled, but wouldn’t let me get close to him. He swam over to his friend and jumped on his back. Why was I being neglected? Did he not like my bathing suit? I suddenly felt unpretty and lost confidence. I got out of the pool and put on shorts and my teeshirt. As I sat on the picnic bench watching the two of them a strange feeling of jealousy crept into my chest. What! Of that weirdo? But he got more attention than me. A while later they also got out and packed their things to leave. His friend didn’t acknowledge me as he walked to the car. Before my guy left, he said he still wanted to marry me. He said this without giving me a kiss.

Weeks went by. He stopped coming to the house. I called him. And called him. I left a message. Then another. My body ached for his touch. My heart ached for his words and adoration. My mind ached for reassurance. Finally he called back and said he was going to take me on a date. Butterflies filled my stomach. Mom was counting on me to help her at work, but I begged her to give me the day off. She saw the desperation in my eyes and said ok. I waited for hours, just sitting on the front lawn looking down the road searching for his car. I was still sitting in the same place when my mom came home from work.

More weeks went by without explanation of his strange behaviour. Tears ran each time my heart broke. It broke everyday.

One day he just showed up at my house. We sat on the couch and my head spun with confusion. He said he wanted me. I said I needed him. We kissed. But then he said he had a confession. No ways! Was he serious? He did what?!? He said I deserved better. Meaning what? This was supposed to be love! After he left, I cried all night.

The next morning, I knew exactly what to do.

To be continued…


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