Glamour Mom

Before

I swept my dark hair up into a sleek updo held by ebony pins and made shiny with gloss. Was feeling pretty good until later that day my baby kept grabbing the hair underneath and pulling it out in front of everyone. Note to self: bring spare pins.

Flowy silk lace wrapped around my body in a lovely dress with ruffles round the neckline. Looks great with my 3 inch heels but please ignore that huge baby drool stain on my shoulder.

Black smouldering eyeshadow with glittery gold gives a glamourous smokey look to any woman’s eyes. Hopefully it will distract from the bloodshot and teary eyes of a sleep deprived, super emotional new mom.

Dark denim and bright stitching of flared designer jeans worn to compliment the curves of a womanly shape. That fashionable rip near the ankle marks the unforgettable event of a tempramental baby with new teeth.

Custom ordered marquise diamond placed in a unique design on white gold band given to me by my fiance. It represents love and promises of love no matter what. Now worn on hands that constantly works with nappies, baby milk, butt cream, and everything in between.

Fresh and flirty perfume once lured in a man and made him dream of late nights and romance. The same perfume has new assignment: cover and distract smells from leaked breastmilk, baby sweat, and poopy nappies.

After

I titled this post “Glamour Mom” but most of the time I honestly feel like a frump! Am I the only one who thinks, ‘why do I bother?’ I just hope that all these mommy quirks can somehow be charming and looked on with humour. 🙂

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Clothes in my Closet

Each peice of clothing in my closet tells a story.

Clothes that hold dear memories are kept and cherished forever. I have a skirt that is beige with big maroon roses I bought at Gabes with my friends Amy and Kim when we were teenagers. That skirt is over a decade old and I love it and wear it. The perfect vintage peice that reminds me of good times with good friends.

I used to be a shopaholic.

I am every retailer’s ideal customer: easily sold! Why? A lifetime of low self esteem and clothes are my cure. If I have THAT, then I’ll be pretty. If I have THIS, then I’ll be confident. If I wore IT tomorrow, then my life would be better.  The new clothes get me excited for new adventures I’ll be having while wearing them. I love mixing new with old, designer with bargain, and lots of layers to add color and personality.

My clothes and I have a relationship. I respect them and take care of them. If memories go sour, they get thrown out. If they get lost or destroyed, I miss them. Clothes shouldn’t, but they define me. Or at least I feel they do.

Much has changed since becoming a mom. I am no longer a shopaholic. I am less attached to my dribbled on, spit up on, pooped on, spilled on and stained clothes. But memories are still being remembered with the clothes I wear so not everything has changed. 🙂

Do you have clothes that remind you of special events or people in your life?

Roads in Life

Looking back at what has happened in our life to make us laugh, make us think, make us cry and sometimes wonder “is this really my life?”

When I was about 17 years old I got my first present from a boy [who
was not my brother]. A ‘Buns of Steel’ aerobic VHS. Ha! I thought it
was great! My bum toned up and I went down a trouser size that spring!

In my 19th year my family drove out to Utah for an uncles wedding and on our way back home to Ohio, the old van mom was driving decided it had had enough. At a rest area the engine caught on fire and we and everyone else there ran to the other side of the building. We heard the explosion. The windows blow. We lost A LOT due to overpacking. However, no one was injured. And if we didn’t learn any lessons from that experience, then we lost everything.

At 21 I lived by myself in a flat in Sweden and for the first time in
my life I was really alone. My older brother in Canada, my other
brother in England, and the rest of the family in Ohio. The apartment
was full of quiet. I played CDs of conference talks to fill the space
with a voice. And often as I sat at the dinner table, my heart ached.
I missed my family, I missed my home, and I missed how easy it used to
be to smile.

Looking back at my life I can honestly say I only have very few
regrets. I wish I saved more and shopped less. I wish I had bought a
wedding dress with 2 numbers instead of 4. That’s about it. I’m
grateful for all that happens because I hope it builds character. With
each trial I experience, I can relate to more people. My words would
be genuine when I say, “I understand”. I’m grateful for all the silly
things that still make me laugh. And how lucky am I to have
opportunities to learn some of lifes greatest lessons!

A reminder of the bigger picture:

The Weaver

My life is but a weaving between my Lord and me,
I cannot choose the colors He worketh steadily.

Oft times He weaveth sorrow, and I in foolish pride
forget He sees the upper but I the under side.

Not till the loom is silent and the shuttles cease to fly,
shall God unroll the canvas and explain the reason why.

The dark threads are as needed in the Weaver’s skillful hand,
as threads of gold and silver in the pattern life has planned.

Being A Mom

A friend of mine has asked everyone who blogs to share a mom story. Hmmm…. so many.

I will share MOM moments.

Ethan has recently been trying to roll away off his changing mat as I am changing his nappy. He actually laughs as I roll him back in place and just to make things even better he loves to grab himself down there spreading the mess!

It was really hot out and I decided to leave Ethan in just his nappy. Soon, he managed to undo his nappy and roll out of it! I did not get upset, instead I was fully convinced my baby is a genius 🙂

Naptimes are always something to talk about. I had just laid Ethan in his crib thinking he had fallen asleep making his usual noises as he drifts off to sleep. We have to pat him on his back or bum until hes in deep sleep. I kept patting patting and patting, I noticed his eyes were straining to stay closed. I stopped patting and he whined. I patted and he was quiet. I stopped and he whined and in my mind I am thinking he is faking it and how cheeky! This is not a baby spa kiddo! I started giggling and he peeked! He then started giggling with me. The kid was not ready for naptime afterall! He was just chilling! Cheeky!

These are my Ethan kisses!

Ethan loves TV!

He even has his favorite shows we record for him. The last couple of weeks he has shown that he knows the remote in my hand is connected to the TV! As soon as I pick up the remote, he looks over at the TV and waits for it to come on! On days when Shaun and I watch our shows, Ethan gets fussy until we put the children’s channel back on and he’s a happy bug again!

Being a mom is not easy but somehow those giggles and cuddles and slobbery kisses make it all feel wonderful and worth it.

a Confession: more Compassion, less Complaining

 

Recently I have been coming to terms with what kind of person I portray myself to be. Like a wake up call. There is a saying, “Your words reveal what is in your heart.” I want a good heart and I want people to know that, but they won’t if I am a negative person. So how did I get to be this way? Struggles of course but I do believe the challenges in our lives are meant to strengthen our character, not vice versa. However I recognise that sometimes we are pushed to our limits but it is necessary.

Who starts a conversation complaining? Me! Why? Because I know that the person I am talking to can complain about the same thing therefore touching common ground. I do not want to be this way anymore. I want compassion to fill my heart. I want people to want to be around me because I make them feel good through my positivity and optimism. A goal that needs much work at the moment.

Does anyone else find negativity a burden?

On facebook, that grand social network, I am finding so much B—-ing in people’s statuses that it gets me down. Are we all coming out of a global winter depression? Was mankind always this way? Do we all need therapy? Maybe the people complaining think they are the only ones doing it.

If there is one thing we all have in common as a human race is that we are all facing and overcoming troubles. Let us be compassionate towards each other.

We often get told that someone else has it worse and we should be grateful. Do you ever roll your eyes and think, ‘yeah yeah I know.’ But really, we have much to be grateful for. Someone once said, if you get on your knees and thank God for all your blessings, you’ll be surprised how long you stay there.

How quick are we to complain about others and slow to own up to our own weaknesses and faults? Universal but forgotten truth: no one is perfect!

I believe that as we individually make effort to do more acts of kindness and say more kind things to people and about people, our hearts will more easily fill with compassion. Our eyes will be more open to see the good in people.

Let the innocence of our children be a reminder of all that is good.